Why?

Why do men from southwestern illinois think it's ok to ask a woman they've never met whether her 'carpets match the curtains'?

Why do aforementioned men get pissed off and call aforementioned woman a 'bitch' when she tells them they're fucking retards and to fuck right off?

Why does Noodle Dawg think it's ok to shit in the corner of the living room even though she knows she's supposed to go outside and does so consistently?

Why do I have an obsession with Paranormal State and let myself get frightened by it every Monday night, even though I don't believe in god, the supernatural, demons, angels ghosties and ghoulies and long leggedy beasties and things that go bump in the night?

Why do I have an obsession with Intervention and - never mind. I know the answer to that one.

Why haven't I heard of Dooce before now and why am I currently obsessed with reading her blog, right from the very beginning?

Why do I find Senor DrugMonkey so fucking hilarious? Actually, that's a dumb question. I know why he's hilarious. If somebody could promise me that I'd get to work with him all the time, I'd go to pharmacy tech school tomorrow.

Why can't I be satisfied with what I've got?

Why does it take weeks for my insurance company to approve my surgery? How is it that a respected surgeon (he's the head of the plastic and reconstructive surgery department at SLU, which is no small feat, imo) can say 'yes, she needs this done' but some peon at an insurance company who's probably never even BEEN in an OR to observe a surgery let alone done the cutting themselves has the final say on whether it gets approved or not?

Why am I such a bitch to people sometimes?

Why do I have such a low threshold for ignorance and stupidity?

Why does poor spelling aggrivate me so much?

How am I ever going to make it through another 4 months of unemployment without losing my fucking mind???