Monday, January 19, 2009

Errrm...okay, then.

Yesterday, as I was jogging across the parking lot to WalMart (yes, I sold my soul to the devil and went. I didn't want to, but I knew they had the Caesar salad dressing with asiago cheese that I really like and can't find anywhere else, so I went. Bite me if you don't like it) I had a brief but interesting conversation with a Short Fat Balding Black Dude in urine stained sweat pants and a dirty Rams hoodie:

SFBBD: Hey! How YOU doin'?

Me (looking behind me to see if there's someone behind me): Errr...okay, thanks.

SFBBD: When you gonna invite me to dinner? Invite me to dinner sometime!

Me (confused): Err.....I'm kinda busy, but.....

SFBBD: It's Alex! I'm Alex! Don't forget!

Me: Umm...sure, I'll try not to.....

SFBBD: Yeah! Later! *waves with both hands, walking backwards so he can keep looking at me*

Me: Umm....okay, then. Yeah dude, see ya later.....*under my breath* not fucking likely, matey. Not if I can help it.

Urbaner: D'you know that guy?

Me: No! I have no fucking clue who that dude is....

U: Man, he LIKES you! YOU got yourself a new friend! Aww!

Me: shut the fuck up before I kick you.....

Why is it always the freaks and drunks who hit on me? Why can't I get hit on by a sane, nice guy for once?


h. said...

I normally repel the insane. Except when I am pregnant. When I am pregnant I attract the insane like snot to preschoolers. They come out of the wood work and want to be my friends. It is some hormonal thing, because I've never looked pregnant when I was pregnant. Luckily, I should never have this problem again, and should continue to repel the insane! Phew!

Evil Transport Lady said...

Same here, I haven't been hit on by a good looking guy in years:(

Just the freaks and geeks:(

La Pierna Negra said...

I'm throwing this out here but perhaps the sane men are not hitting on you because you have a ring on your finger. I imagine sane guys would not hit on married women. It's a thought.